Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts

Saturday, 13 July 2013

'Grown Ups 2': The Best Lines from the Worst Reviews


A large consensus of the nation's top film critics has decided that you should waste no time or money on the Adam Sandler comedy Grown Ups 2.

Although the Sony sequel, which also stars Kevin James, Chris Rock and Salma Hayek, debuted in theaters Thursday evening with impressive box office numbers -- grossing $2.3 million -- movie reviewers across American are collectively panning the film. Here are the best lines of the worst reviews:

John DeFore, The Hollywood Reporter: "Sandler, whose best work tends to be his least rewarded at the box office, has never before made a sequel. (One could argue, of course, that his early hits were the same movie in different clothes.) That he would make an exception for Grown Ups says nothing good about his trajectory as an artist -- at this point, even combining those five words may provoke snickers."

Andy Webster, The New York Times: "This is pap, plain and simple: scattered raunch-lite devoid of emotional resonance. At best, it sells itself on the spectacle of a TV show’s cast reunion — and even then it disappoints. With the debacles of That’s My Boy and Jack and Jill, Mr. Sandler has increasingly squandered his comic capital. His onetime SNL brethren do themselves few favors — beyond a paycheck — by working in his orbit.

ANALYSIS: 'Grown Ups 2': Adam Sandler's Big Test

Mark Olsen, Los Angeles Times: "Judd Apatow's recent This Is 40 more fully explored a similar anxiety of middle-age and the comedic pathos of everyday life with messily vibrant results. With the slack, lackadaisical effort of Grown Ups 2, Sandler has perhaps revealed himself not as a confrere of Apatow, who directed him in Funny People to a performance both crude and soulful. Rather, he's the white Tyler Perry: smart enough to know better, savvy enough to do it anyway, lazy enough not to care."

Matt Patches, Time Out New York: "Reuniting Sandler and his high-school buddies, Grown Ups 2’s suburban vignettes find room for every lowbrow gag: chocolate-as-poop jokes, Shaquille O’Neal’s clown faces, digs at transgender bodybuilders and the “burp snart”—a burp-sneeze-fart combo given more screen time than any of the female performers. Put it this way: In the first five minutes, a deer walks into the star’s bedroom and urinates on his face. It’s all downhill from there."

Claudia Puig, USA Today: "This eye-rolling excursion in toilet humor seems all the more tone-deaf given that Sandler is a few years shy of 50. His comic schtick has long been aimed at 13-year-old boys, but his latest efforts are an insult to adolescents of any age."

Mick LaSalle, San Francisco Chronicle: "Indeed, if you scooped up someone from 500 years ago, some poor soul not inured to entertainment as a form of abuse, and made the unlucky victim sit through either The Lone Ranger or Pacific Rim, he'd probably go mad and never recover. Thus the bar gets lowered, and the temptation arises to say something nice about Grown Ups 2 just because it doesn't cause injury. But no, it's a bad movie, too, just old-school bad, the kind that's merely lousy and not an occasion for migraines or night sweats."

Connie Ogle, Miami Herald: "All you need to know about this new movie? Rob Schneider sat this one out. Yes. The guy who played Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo — twice — apparently said: No thanks, I’m busy."

Mark Jenkins, NPR: "It might be time for the actor to play a character who more honestly embodies the hostility his performances exude. But apparently Sandler's not grown up enough for that yet."

Friday, 28 June 2013

In Theaters This Weekend: Reviews of 'White House Down,' 'The Heat' and More

Sony's summer gamble on a non-superhero film, White House Down, hits the big screen Friday, June 28.


The action-thriller stars Channing Tatum as a Secret Service agent who must protect the U.S. president, played by Jamie Foxx, from being harmed by a paramilitary group attacking Washington, D.C. Helmed by Independence Day director Roland Emmerich, the movie also stars Maggie Gyllenhaal, James Woods, Richard Jenkins and Jason Clarke.


For a more comical weekend, Paul Feig's The Heat sees Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock teaming up as an unlikely pair -- potty-mouthed detective Shannon Mullins (McCarthy) and uptight FBI agent Sarah Ashburn (Bullock) -- to catch a drug lord on the loose.


PHOTOS: Jamie Foxx and Channing Tatum: Exclusive Portraits of the 'White House Down' Stars


Read what The Hollywood Reporter's film critics have to say about all the films opening this weekend and find out how they are expected to perform at the box office.


White House Down


Channing Tatum and Jamie Foxx join forces as the presidential residence comes under attack by paramilitary thugs in Roland Emmerich's latest action-thriller. Read David Rooney's review here.


The Heat


Paul Feig's comedy stars Sandra Bullock as an uptight FBI agent and Melissa McCarthy as a crass Boston street cop. Read Todd McCarthy's review here.


Byzantium


Gemma Arterton and Saoirse Ronan play 200-year-old vampires in director Neil Jordan's female twist on the bloodsucking genre. Read David Rooney's review here.


PHOTOS: Melissa McCarthy, Sandra Bullock Turn Up 'The Heat' At New York Premiere


A Band Called Death


A better-than-fiction doc resurrects a seminal African-American rock band. Read Justin Lowe's review here.


Copperhead


Gettysburg director Ron Maxwell looks at Northern opposition to the Civil War. Read John DeFore's review here.


Redemption


Steven Knight's thriller stars Jason Statham as a former Special Forces soldier dealing with the mean streets of London. Read Frank Scheck's review here.


Laurence Anyways


Montreal auteur Xavier Dolan's stylish, gender-bending epic stars Melvil Poupaud and Suzanne Clement as a couple that can never quite live either together or apart. Read Stephen Dalton's review here.


STORY: Channing Tatum, Jamie Foxx and 'White House Down's' Superhero-Free Summer Gamble


Magic Camp


Judd Ehrlich's documentary finds a slew of would-be David Copperfields in the Pennsylvania countryside as they attend Tannen's Magic Camp, held every summer. Read John DeFore's review here.


How to Make Money Selling Drugs


Matthew Cooke's directorial debut uses a tongue-in-cheek conceit to look at the War on Drugs. Read John DeFore's review here.


Detention of the Dead


Alex Craig Mann sends zombies to high school. Read John DeFore's review here.


100 Bloody Acres


Damon Herriman and Angus Sampson are backwoods brothers just trying to make a living in this off-the-wall Australian splatter-comedy. Read Megan Lehmann's review here.


Museum Hours


Engagingly offbeat docudrama draws links between Renaissance art and modern society. Read Stephen Dalton's review here.


Some Girl(s)


Adam Brody and Kristen Bell star in an adaption of the Neil LaBute play. Read John DeFore's review here.


Twitter: @sajilpl

Monday, 24 June 2013

The Macalope: The reviews are in!

And iOS 7 is a dud!

 

Yes, it’s another Apple colossafail, so feel free to rerun all those “Apple doomed” stories you …

 

Wait, the reviews? Reviewing developer previews that aren’t due for general release for months is a thing the tech press is going to do now? Well, they practically try to review unreleased Apple hardware, too, so this is actually an improvement.

 

“Flattened Affect”

 

Subhead?

 

“I’ve spent a week with iOS 7 and I’m already bored.”

 

Farhad Manjoo says, “I think that subhead is unfortunate.”

 

Indeed! If only someone could do something about that!

 

Say, who wrote this piece, anyway?

 

By Farhad Manjoo

 

Oh, journalism. Why must you always be such a busted-up Rube Goldberg machine?

 

Beware: The OS is still in beta phase, so it’s annoyingly buggy.

 

UGH, THIS BETA SOFTWARE IS SOOO BUGGY. LAME, ONE STAR.

 

Because the software is clearly a work in progress, I’ve tried to give it every benefit of the doubt …

 

I TRIED BUT, UGH, IT’S GOT BUGS AND EVERYTHING.

 

… and I expect that a lot of it will be improved by the time it’s launched publicly in the fall.

 

He suspects there will be a lot of improvements to this beta product that’s not going to be released for months. Because he’s a tech journalist. That’s the kind of insight you get paid to come up with.

 

At this point, though, I’m puzzled by iOS 7.

 

Quick! To the keyboard!

 

For a redesign that’s so immediately jarring and radical, it comes to feel strangely superficial over time.

 

Uh, yeah, maybe because there aren’t any apps that take advantage of its underlying technological improvements. Why is that? Oh, that’s right, because it’s a developer preview. For developers. So they can update their apps to work with it.

 

In other words, does iOS 7 change how your device works, rather than just how it looks?

 

Huh. If only there was some way to find out.

 

OH, WELL.

 

It doesn’t add many new features to your phone.

 

Control Center. Notification Center improvements. Multitasking for all apps. Camera improvements. Photo gallery improvements. AirDrop. Safari improvements. iTunes Radio. Siri improvements. App Store improvements. Security improvements. Not many, no.

 

Look, it’s fine to talk about the design choices present in iOS 7. It’s even OK to critique them, if you happen to be an actual designer and have a clue what you’re talking about. But offering your review of an unfinished developer beta? This we do not need.